Anonymous asked: I have a huge tumblr crush on you. We have the same interests and the same kinks. Fml.
why are you not in my house right now
alternatively you are my clone
write a message roughly the length of a small essay
tumblr tells me I can’t send it without following the recipient and deletes the entirety of my text
whenever someone on tumblr says “I’m posting this because no one’s awake so no one will see it”, i look outside my window at the beautiful sunny day outside. it is mid afternoon. the Australians will always be awake and ready for your 3am shame posts
this once ran on a god damn premium cable network
this is my actual favorite skit of all time